Two Star Nights

Sometimes things happen in small increments. I was thinking of an artist friend the other morning while musings of purpose and destiny floated through my head like so many capricious clouds. This one friend lives far away, and is cautious about communication and judgements. I guess you could call him a sceptic. We have an intellectual connection I value and as I tend to be quite verbal, there have been times where I know I test his Spartan temperament. Over time, that terse nature of his has had a fruitful influence on my determination to keep on keeping on with my writing, my tapestries, my poems and photography. His dedication to his art is inspiring, that is for sure. I remember how my at times passionate attempts to breach his defenses would exasperate him, and I recall how in spite of that, he viewed my temperament with very generous words. He called my will to surpass obstacles as "fierce", and my mind as "brilliant". I cannot think of any person past or present, teacher, friend , lover or otherwise, who ever gave me two such awesome labels. On dark days, those two words flash in my mind like two bright stars guiding night into a new day. Aesop once said : " No act of kindness, however small, is ever wasted." I think my far away friend may never fully realize what his patience and kindness at a particular difficult moment did for my self confidence and determination. It is an amazing thing, the courage to give, to be kind, even when you don't really feel like it. You plant a seed, however tiny perhaps, that with some luck and spit may turn into a flower of hope. I think in a way this friend of mine does not even particularly like me, but he is the only person I can think of who had the balls to give me a charge when I was really insecure. Our connection is awkward at best, but there is a certain grace and tolerance to his crusty demeanour that I respect. He makes me feel like Alice in Wonderland, slightly dazed and confused, but very, very determined. I think he is not the rabbit, nor the wise caterpillar, nor the Cheshire Cat. Rather, he is the artist in charge of the magical garden down that rabbit hole. I feel I am always learning something new and unusual. Thank you, Don Juan, for those two star nights.